Flash Tape--A little flash of AMAZING

Are you tired of constantly tugging at your clothes to make sure your bra strap isn't hanging out?  Tired of constantly pulling your shirt up to prevent your girls from making their debut?  Tired of that gaping hole right in the 'busty' area of your blouse?  If so, let me tell you about my little flash of amazing--it's called FLASH TAPE and it is a life saver!!

I am a very particular girl--I don't like my underwear showing, don't like my shirt to pull up when I bend over, don't like to worry about anything being seen that isn't supposed to be seen, so this product has been so amazing for me.  How did I discover it, you might ask?  Well, I stole it from my kids!  Kiki had some very long socks that she wore for her jazz solo and she used this tape to hold them up so they didn't fall down in the middle of a jete or a baryshnikov (doesn't my command of the 'dance' language impress you?!), and the surprising thing is that it totally worked!  Despite jumping, spinning, rolling around on the floor etc. her socks didn't come down.  After a while my pea sized brain communicated to me that this might be something that I could use in my wardrobe so I commandeered it out of the girls' dance bag, claimed it as my own and found new life in my wardrobe!  Now I could wear off the shoulder shirts that didn't fall off the shoulder (I know, what's the point if it doesn't fall off the shoulder, right? ) and I could secure those gap-py tops without flashing my clients every time I bent forward (hmmm...business HAS dropped off a little since I started taping up my shirts though...might need to reconsider this).  

One day I had a little panic attack mixed in with a hissy fit when I reached into my drawer and the tape was MISSING!!  ARGH!!  I called to my kids, "Where's the sticky tape?!"

"Oh." says Mo, "I lent it to See and she chucked it into her dance bag and I didn't have the heart to ask for it back."

"ASK FOR IT BACK.  RIGHT NOW!!  TEXT HER!", I demanded!  "Why can't I have ANYTHING in this house without you guys always using it?  You use my hair straightener, my hair spray,  my brush, my razor.  Everything! What is it with you guys?!!!"

"Umm...Mom" says Mo, "Didn't you steal that out of MY dance bag?"

Me: "Oh." (gulp)

Me:  "Nevermind..."

Me: walks to drug store and buys own roll of Flash Tape.

Me:  happy now...and all tucked in!

Now I am assured that I will not have any wardrobe malfunctions such as these:

A little flash tape on the shoulder would have kept the boulder out of sight...
A little slip of the nip is not pleasant.

No amount of flash tape could fix this.  The product does have it's limitations.  Perhaps some pants, or as my mom would say, slacks, might help?
So, go spend the 12 bucks and keep your girls tucked in!

No thanks is necessary but if you feel the need, just leave a roll of the flash tape at my door...



Comments

Anonymous said…
I love that you're back!!!
Anonymous said…
Gymnasts use a similar product to keep their bathing suits from doing a back flip while they're doing a forward roll.
Nancy said…
Just found you on mmb. And all I can say is "dear flash tape, please don't be hard to find!" Want some. Thanks!

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